I won't really fly with the narrative that all men are the same similarly, I am not the same as the next woman a man will go in a relationship with. But then there are certain character traits that we will find dominant in the majority, and this is usually in cases of societal norms and standards.
In all my years of relationships, here's one thing all the men had in common, they cheated. Even the one I trusted and was beating chest for that he was different ended in chest pain, heartaches and premium tears.
But despite this, the men were not the same because they all had their individual differences. While some showed me genuine love and care, another was the bane of my entire existence.
My mother will always say all men are the same, they just have minor differences like what I cited above. Westerners call it the same Joe, minor differences.
This is not to say that all men cheat
From my end of the world, it's not uncommon to see a woman mount unnecessary financial pressure on her man or boyfriend. In some cases, the women will be earning, but they will never spend their money.
They run with the tag my money is my money and my man's money is our money. Dating or marrying such women is parasitic because you will keep giving and getting nothing in return.
Personally, if I am in a relationship where the man continues to give, and I don't reciprocate, my conscience will judge me, plus I feel such behavior breeds disrespect, and I love to be respected.
No matter how little, even if it's wrist beads or bracelets or even if it's polo, even the popular boxers and singlets work too anything that is substantial I like to do or gift my man. It could also be cooking his favorite meal, doing his laundry or fueling his car.
Take care of your man as much as he takes care of you. That's the standard of love and relationship I operate by which might not be the same with the next woman.
I have always opined that the future and sustainability of our contemporary society lies with the home. You see that word Charity begins at home? It's deep.
Just this week, my sister was gisting us how her son, my nephew, is a ladies man in school. She says whenever she goes to pick him up, he's always in the midst of women. And these women serve him. It should be worth noting that these children are not more than 3 years old.
It's either they are feeding him, picking imaginary particles from his hair or dusting his uniform for imaginary dust. The moment they see my sister, some are arranging his lunch bag, another set is busy arranging his uniform and once they are done prepping him, they are escorting him and handing him over to his mother.
While we laughed over it as it might seem funny, I later reflected deeply on it.
I kept questioning myself, is it that the attitude of women to want to serve men and compete over men is inborn?
While I concluded, it was instinct and has nothing to do with societal norms or standards.
It hits me, and just as I drew the conclusion, several questions popped up in my head, How does the mother of these children behave? How do they treat their fathers? How do women in their environment behave?
Then again, it proved my theory right that however a human being turns out is greatly dependent on the home.
You see my nephew and my daughter? I try to find the perfect mix between being strict and lenient, I try to understand their personality and deal with them accordingly.
The moment I notice any off character, like my nephew attempting to lay dominance over my daughter or my daughter cleaning up after my nephew, I correct it. I let them understand the values and importance of responsibilities.
I will always tell my daughter whenever her cousin spill or cause a little mess that they can manage, she should direct him to where the rag or mop is, and she should show him how to clean up, let him do it himself and not her.
Furthermore, I wouldn't want the next generation of my nuclear family to be like everyone else. I want them to be unique and different.
Posted Using InLeo Alpha
