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Doing big things is rarely as simple as saying it. We don’t know how to start and even if we do, we don’t have all the knowledge and strength to begin with. And even if we have had past experiences, coming back to starting over again seems harder than what we once experienced. And we almost always have the most urgent things to do so we’re breaking long-term goals.
I know what the basic advice will be, as always: take it one step at a time, break down the work into phases, or manageable pieces, focus on the first small step that will move you forward and avoid distractions.
That’s good advice. But in my experience and current situation, that advice is not enough, Because the reason we fear starting a project is not just because we have too much time or we don’t know where to start. And it’s not because we think it doesn’t matter. In fact, it’s the opposite. The obvious reason why I would think of postponing a project is that it’s important and I don’t want to mess it up. It’s very important that I would be too afraid to start working on it.
Having a business of your own that will make income for you is a dream that everyone will love to achieve and that’s an important project that can create fear in your heart when thinking of starting it. I don’t know how to describe myself in the best way possible. I feel for the first time in my whole life scared and afraid of failure. That I’m going to need a lot of extra energy and support to succeed and spend a lot of time on it while giving up some other responsibilities. I felt overwhelmed knowing how hard it can be to get the financial requirements for such a project and sadly, increases my fear of going on with it. My thoughts: If I can’t do it, why start?
A biblical injunction says to count the cost of a building to know if you can do it or not before starting such a project. Working by that injunction creates more fear in me because the cost of starting the business I want to do is more than I expected. And I also fear the effect of procrastination which can be worse of all.I thought I was ready for this because some of the pre-work has been done. But deep down in my heart, a part of me is scared. Then I learned elsewhere that any big project is like a mirror. It reflects your thoughts, your efforts and your personality. It has your whole life in it. Failure in business is not just financial but an identity problem. When we know our personalities we will create a world that fits those personalities.
Now what should be my solution?
Should I ignore those fears? I do admit it. I need someone to relate with and share my concern with. Ideally, I confided with my wife after telling her my plans, which gets her so excited, but I wasn’t. Her pep talk works like magic and light which sparked some boldness in me.
Hear her: “Now that you know you are going to start trading business like before, take a moment to calm down and experience the fear that comes with the importance of the business. Those fears are normal. Maybe you are afraid you won’t make enough sales to recoup the initial capital to continue buying new stocks after starting it, but not starting it doesn’t guarantee that either. Maybe you are afraid of any unexpected negative situation that may hinder the progress of the business. But how would you know what the outcome would be if you don’t start?”. I think I know now how to handle my anxieties.
How I planned to deal with my fear
Accepting my fear
Yeah, the fear is real and I must not only admit it but also accept it. There is no shame in being afraid everyone does have fear in one area or the other of their lives. I don’t have to try to reduce the anxiety. That will be a false and weak answer and not bold. Accepting my fear is an acknowledgment that I may not have everything I need to meet my expectations; I may not have enough capital to start perfectly. Admitting that reduces my expectations of getting it perfect when I hit.
Fear is the most difficult of all emotions I’ve ever experienced in my life. Why? Because it’s so contrary to everything I believe in and everything I am trying to become. While I am aware of the fact that everyone experiences fear, I have never been good at dealing with it. This emotion is always there ready to tear me down in case something or someone attacks my dreams. It has stopped me from doing so many things in the past, but now I’m not going to let fear win anymore.
Lowering my expectations
Knowing one’s fears also gives you another important purpose. When you recognized that you don’t have all the tools, knowledge, skills and financial support to see the progress of your project, you learned to break your project into manageable phase-by-phase implementation and assign the necessary tools, work skills and finance accordingly and progressively.Instead of looking at the whole ladder I should look at one rug. The big picture should wait for now so I can focus on one piece of the picture.
General advice doesn’t matter at this stage because it will create more fear and confusion in your mind. If you want to know the market price of a thing, it’s better to go to the market to find out by yourself. People would always want to be praised for what they have done by giving false information. For instance, when I asked a friend who is in the line of business that I am going into, how much it cost to begin currently, the amount he told me was like an earthquake in my heart. But when I went to speak with some other experienced traders I was told there is always a way to get around it, and it is not a bad thing to start small.
Deciding when and how to start
Haven has to deal with the initial fear or anxieties, it is finally time to decide when and how to start. However, I feel the fear might still reappear when the business starts. There could still be a feeling of resistance. But now I know what it is. And I will Let those concerned know it, and that way it will be easier to move on.
I know some people may think that am blind or being economical. But that shouldn't have to hunt. Telling others that you are intimidated by something you should do gives them permission to feel, express their concerns, and perhaps give the support they can. There could be people that are kind, supportive, and empathetic.
And such support can make a difference in the long run.
So here I am. If you have any support for me, either words of encouragement or moral support, feel free to drop it in the comment section. I need more of such at this moments.
Most meaningful
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