At first I never liked children; they disturb a lot, and they cry a lot. While growing up, I carried a lot of children, and then my mother was still giving birth, and I had to carry my younger ones whenever they cried or whenever we were out for an occasion.
Most times I have chest pain at times because of too much backing of the baby.Then I was in a boarding school. Whenever I am going back to school, I used to be extremely happy because I wouldn't be carrying babies or feeding them or making them sleep. It was a kind of relief for me, a means to escape.Then nobody cared about my emotions; they kept telling me, You're the first daughter and have the responsibility to take care of your other siblings.
At that moment I wished I was the last born.The last of my siblings came when I was done with high school. No more going back to school. I was stuck with the last born in my family. My mother had to resume work, so it was just me all day with my little pumpkin. My mother always leaves food behind, so I have to feed him, carry him whenever he's crying, sing for him, and even play with him.It was strenuous but fun too. It was fun in the sense that whenever I see him giggle innocently, it's great seeing him laugh, but whenever he cries, that's where the problem comes.
Most times I have spoken to him like begging him to stop crying, and I wonder if he usually understands what I say to him. Silently I was praying for my mother not to have another child again, and I guess my prayers were answered because that was the last of the baby.
Whenever I see my little brother grown now, I just can't help but remember those memories with him. Most times I have to carry him at night whenever he cries at night. Back him on my back and make sure he sleeps before I sleep. I didn't want him to disturb my mother, so I had to take the trouble.After so many years, my phobia of hating kids stopped whenever I saw one around me. I can't resist the urge to carry the child and play with him. This is my colleague's baby, and the other is my supervisor’s baby.
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