Well If you asked me few years ago what it meant to put yourself first, I would probably said it was selfish. I grew up believing that caring for other people should always come before thinking about myself. But life has a way of teaching us lessons, sometimes the hard way. Looking back now, I realize there is a big difference between being selfish and taking care of yourself.
One experience has stayed with me for years.
When I was much younger, I worked as a salesperson in a store in my area. My goal was simple, to save enough money to continue my education. Every salary I received brought me one step closer to buying the entrance examination form and the tuition fee for the first year and other things I might needed. I was excited because I believed I was finally moving toward my dream.
Then one day, my younger brother called me. He wanted to start his own workshop but didn't have enough money. Without thinking twice, I gave him everything I had saved. At the time, I didn't see it as a sacrifice. He was my brother, and I genuinely wanted to help him succeed. Seeing him start his business made me happy, and I believed that when my own time of need came, someone would also be there for me.
Unfortunately, life didn't turn out that way. When it was finally time for me to buy my entrance examination form, I didn't have the money anymore. I reached out for help, hoping someone would support me the way I had supported others. Sadly, no one could help, not my boss, not my parents, and not even my brother, whom I had given all my savings to. That moment was heartbreaking because I realized that good intentions don't always guarantee that the same kindness will come back to you.
Since then, responsibilities have continued to pile up. One responsibility leads to another, and before I know it, another year has gone by. I still haven't had the opportunity to complete my higher education, and sometimes I wonder what life would have been like if I had kept at least part of my savings for myself.
Even with that experience, I don't regret helping my brother. What I regret is not finding a balance. I now understand that putting yourself first doesn't mean you don't love your family or care about other people. It simply means making sure you don't completely neglect your own dreams while trying to build someone else's.
Today, I believe that loving yourself and loving others should go hand in hand. It's okay to support the people we love, but it's also okay to protect our own future. Sometimes helping someone doesn't mean giving away everything you have. Sometimes it means helping within your ability while still holding on to the things you need to move your own life forward.
That experience taught me a lesson I'll never forget. We can't pour from an empty cup. If we ignore our own goals and well-being for too long, we may end up sacrificing opportunities that never come back. Looking after ourselves isn't selfish,vit allows us to stand on our own feet so that we can continue helping others without losing ourselves in the process. That is the balance I now try to live by. Love others wholeheartedly, but don't forget that your dreams matter too.
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