Well, for this, I think my answer would be a mix of all, I have thought about and I’ve come to realize that marriage isn’t just about the ceremonies, but the the life you build after all the ceremonies. We have people who prefer court marriage maybe because of its legal protection, some go for the religious one's maybe because they feel it has spiritual backings, coverings and blessings, some opt for traditional as they believe it shows you still remember your root and identity.
Before going deep, let me say this, the kind of marriage I envisage is one where the man and the woman still chooses each other everyday and continue to stay as one. I want a marriage where love will not be just a feeling as it is for many, but love will be a decision, one never to go back on, a marriage where respect is mutual, value each other and growth is our aim.
Talking about choosing, I can't choose just one, I do prefer na blend of all, I would go thstbof traditional because I know my identify and my culture is not something to erase or take out, also court marriage because in today's world we often take one's right for granted, so legality matter's, and lastly, religious marriage, that is because I believe in GOD and what He orchestrate, there ate times that love won't be enough, but remembering God and kneoinf fully well he has your back, it would help one navigate all of marriage challenges.
Also, the type of marriage we do is not what will hold our home strong or build it, its the people involved, both male and female. I have seen couples do their preferred marriage, I have seem those who did a mix of all and still drifted apart like strangers and I have also seen those who barely made noise about their union, yet their love shine so bright.
Marriage is more than the gowns, suit, colored dress, food, and all that we see, marriage is a daily choice to always show up anytime, even when it is not convenient. Am not saying the ceremonies, good preparations and all are not important, those give honor, respect and recognition.
But beyond all those what holds a marriage more is forgiveness after arguments and issues, commitment even when you seem to see enticing offers, love even when it does not look like it and patience even when your partner is still trying to figure life out. There are marriages that look perfect online, but we forgot they are acting and just showing is what we want to see. Commitment in a relationship is one good virtue to have. It helps marriages stand the test of time, of betrayal, of lack and loss because the people in them were very committed.
If you are not yet married ( am not yet married too😉) but planning to settle down someday, like me, then, don’t just plan the wedding, but plan and prepare for the real marriage. Ask yourself certain simple but very deep questions.... can you give your all, are you really ready to go in, can you sacrifice, are you ready to serve without keeping scores and communicate without ego, are you ready to stand the test of time, are you ready to respect and submit, are you ready to stay committed and honest...and many more are the questions not just to ask but give answers too.
It is important to choose someone whose soul you can feel at ease with both in calmmamd stormy days. A marriage is not made by the crowd that come to witness it. It is made by the two being who says thier vows while communicating their love to each other. Love and commitment should be very obvious and louder than the ceremony.
Thanks a lot for stopping by.
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