Huhm, marriage standards, this topic is a very deep one, we hardly talk about things like this. We all believe we will get married someday, yet only a few of us take the time to define what we truly want in that union. We keep on daydreaming of proposal days, we day dream our engagements and wedding day but we rarely think about our married life, life after marriage.
All what we are about is our ideal spec, a short/tall, dark/light-skinned, hairy, curvy, chubby person, also the social media has shown and hyped certain things and we use that as our focus. We don't sit to think, to really have a deep thought about it all, to think of life after marriage, to think of what exactly we want in a marriage, who are we becoming to match the desire.
I do say it, marriage is more than beauty and physical charm for me, don't get me wrong, I love beauty, I want a physically attractive woman, one that makes my heart race when I look at her. But the truth is, beauty alone doesn’t build a home. There are other things to look out for, I am a man, and no man will be ready to do or please a woman he finds out is not submissive, doesn't take to corrections, lacks respect, lazy, dirty, lacks good character/behavior and all.
That aside, the bible even say "he who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtain....."(Proverbs 18 vs 22). This is not a Sunday school or bible class, so I won't want to be talking on that, 🤪. I personally want a wife who is romantic, someone who knows how to love intentionally, not just in public, but privately too. I want more than a wife, I want a sister, a mother, a prayerful partner, a sister, a bestfriend, you know, someone I can be vulnerable with, someone who nurtures and knows when I’m off, even without me saying a word, someone who laughs with me, fights for me, prays with me, hold and stand with me through every storm and calmness.
Mind you, I know no one is perfect, I’m not asking for perfection, I’m asking for purpose. A woman who knows who she is, and loves herself enough to love me rightly. A woman who will cook, take care of the children and all not because its her duty, not because I can't, but because we both understand our roles and embrace them. Not that I can't or won't help with things also, am a good cook, I rarely eat out and most time's, even my neighbors do ask me if I would ever allow my woman to be doing the cooking. It is what I love.
Also, she will work, not a job that ties her down, but a work of her own, one has control over, a business that hives her financial freedom and time for the family. There's the need for partnership and productivity in a relationship, it is not only the lazy or busy ones that hire help, so am not against having nanny, cleaner and such as long as the home is healthy and happy.
In all, I still believe so much in character, a woman who's humble, respectful, kind, patient, prayerful, God-fearing and all, a womam who's all this will know what to do and what not to, she will know how to run and build her home. Beauty doe's nothing in building the home, behavior and character does, they are the ones that help sustain love. That's why I said earlier that I’m not asking for perfection, but for purpose.
And as for submission and the bible text I quoted earlier, I believe it’s a two-way thing. The bible also says...Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church, and wives, submit to your husbands.
So that's it, as a man be ready to love sacrificially, also lead with love and not ego, protect her, provide for her and be present. That way, the submission on her end won't be won’t be a burden, because my love won’t be a weapon also. We must love and submit to one another, but as the man, I’ll take the lead with wisdom, grace, and God at the center, while knowing fully well that my partner is ready also to be a wife.
A lot of times people talk about marriages, we get scared, instead on looking inwards to see how we can better manage, run and build ours. Marriage they do say is an institution, one where you never get to graduate from, also marriage is the only institution you already receive your certificate immediately you put in/start.
We all know marriage is a journey and not a destination. And in this journey, I want peace, joy, growth, commitment, productivity and deep friendship. I want pillow talks, joint prayers, funny arguments, trips, and a family that’s filled with laughter. I don’t need a perfect woman, just one whose heart aligns with mine, a woman who’s ready to build, pray, grow, learn, and love with God as our foundation. That is my standard and my earnest prayer.
All pictures are mine
Thanks for taking your time to read through, kindly do well to drop your response/opinion, while visiting my blog for more exclusive content.
Posted Using INLEO
