"True apology is a willingness to make amends." - Harriet Lerner
A sincere apology is an essential tool that calms anger, and it's one of the important keys in keeping relationships both intimate and none intimate. But it's like we've made it an escape route for our misbehavior.
Though in receiving or giving apology, we no longer perceive the guilt of our actions as a threat, it helps us to move past our anger and that prevents us from being stuck in the past. Apology is one unique key that opens the door to forgiveness by allowing us to have empathy.
The big problem that we come across is not in the apologizing but it's in the behavior itself that caused the initial wrong. There's a fine line between true sorrow and manipulation. Sincere apologies come with a change of actions or character. If our apology for our wronged actions does not follow with a change of behavior it's seen as a manipulation, and no one wants to be manipulated. It's often said that "actions are bigger than words", and in such cases that is the actual fact.
We are built with the craving nature to need a remedy to our wounds and that begins with an apology. And when apology is seen as manipulation, there is no tendency for the wound to be healed.
Oftentimes what we are hearing from a person and what we are seeing from a person does not match, that person becomes inconsistent,and with that trust becomes impossible without consistency.
Apologies can be made meaningful by listening actively, taking responsibility or ownership of our actions and making an effort to make amends, making concrete restitution, showing understanding and empathy,and following through on commitments, I believe that would go a long way.
Apology without change of actions tends to erode trust, damage our relationship with others, it increases resentment, and lack of growth.
I'm happy for what I've learned so far as far as this topic is concerned, it's actually true that we learn everyday, because if i had learned what i know now, there are some mistakes i would have avoided and settled unnecessary regrets.
I believe that there are some actionable steps which would be of help in rendering sincere apology; such as reflecting on our intentions and actions, practicing self-awareness and accountability, developing empathy and understanding, making amends and following through correcting our actions.
In all apologies should be sincere and action-oriented, because when it's action-oriented it brings about empathy and understanding that fosters quick healing. Apology that is action-oriented helps to rebuild trust and respect. Accountability is also important, and it's essential for growth where manipulation through apology can be eradicated.
Thank you for reading ♥️
Still remain @pricelessudy
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