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MY EXPERIENCE WITH ANXIETY AND HOW I HAVE LIVED WITH IT EVER SINCE

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rishagamo
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Anxiety is a feeling of anxiousness, a strong sense of unease. According to Wikipedia: "Anxiety is an emotion characterised by an unpleasant state of inner turmoil and includes feelings of dread over anticipated events. 1 Anxiety is different from fear in that fear is defined as the emotional response to a present threat, whereas anxiety is the anticipation of a future one. 2 It is often accompanied by nervous behavior such as pacing back and forth, somatic complaints, and rumination" link

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I vividly recall the first time I experienced this feeling. It was during my second year of college when I left school to visit my girlfriend in a different state, far from my campus. The only friends aware of my journey were my closest companions; one is now a lawyer, and the other a Gospel artist. The lawyer strongly disagreed with my decision to travel, even saying I might have an accident and that it wasn't safe. while, the now Gospel artist encouraged me and even offered some money for transportation.

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It was my first time traveling to that state, and I did so without any family members knowing my destination or how long I would be gone for, leaving them to believe I was at school as at that period of time. I arrived at my first destination very late that day, and by then, the park was already closed. I had to take another route, which is a story for another time. My mobile phone had no battery, and I had to find a place to charge it for a few minutes before I could contact my girlfriend for directions to her location.

The first day was peaceful and without any issues, but after that, I began to feel uneasy, experiencing serious fears and worries about the unknown. Thoughts like, "What if this happens?" or "What if that happens?" filled my mind. Initially, I decided to call my elder brother, who was also in school but at a different institution. I told him what I had done and how long I would be staying. He was fine with it, and I thought I would feel relieved because a family member was aware of my whereabouts.

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Unfortunately, that night, the feelings intensified, preventing me from sleeping. I became so restless that my breathing became abnormal, my body temperature rose, and I felt nauseous. I was sweating profusely, and my heart rate was very fast; it felt as if my heart was going to stop. It was the first time I had experienced such a thing, and I couldn't explain it. My then-girlfriend was so confused by the situation and it kept her up all night.
This was my first encounter with anxiety, and it has recurred several times ever since.

Recently, I went to the bathroom to relieve myself, and a serious fear gripped me. I immediately lost consciousness, unaware of my surroundings. Thankfully, a friend who was nearby noticed what had happened and tapped me, which brought me back to consciousness. This was a result of the thought I was having about my life, where I am now, and what next step to take. I was so worried about my life that I had another episode of anxiety.

Anxiety is a very serious health challenge and should not be treated as a minor issue. Those who have experienced anxiety, like myself, will understand this well. I have not found a cure for it, and I am open to advice from anyone with more experience in managing it.

Thank you for your time I remain @rishagamo, and the above is my response to the Hive Learners Weekly Featured Content Week 163 Episode 01 – “ANXIETY”.

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