The path of balance is a tricky one. I don’t want to say it’s difficult because that could be a self fulfilling prophecy to be, but I have yet to meet someone who had such a path laid out before them with an instruction manual and without challenges along the way that make them doubt or question the path itself.
Many people are gifted on one side or the other. They have a strong will, or they are easy going by nature. Some are afraid to move and so they stay put for far longer than they have to. Some walk haphazardly through the mountains and occasionally find this path only to become impatient or doubtful and wander back off in another direction.
What exactly is this path?
In one hand, acceptance of the present moment.
In the other, the fire to create, to move, to have an influence on our surroundings.
Both sides require their own peace of mind and love. Love for self, love for the all.
I find myself exceedingly frustrated with things that are not clearly in my control, yet not completely out of my control. The things I can affect, but which no clear path is obvious. The way in which the time to pursue certain goals and projects hasn’t fully presented itself yet, or has presented less than I had hoped or has left me with a confusing set of options.
But the hand that carries acceptence teaches me not to doubt. Life always speaks with us. Whatever I see, hear, smell, the thoughts that pop up in my head, they’re all a conversation. The universe speaks to me, as it speaks to all of us.
You can personify life as the god of your tradition, or a collection of gods or spirits or ancestors. Maybe you know something I do not, but I feel most comfortable leaving the blanks blank until experience and trial and error provide me with more information. I belief faith is a personal path towards knowing, not something we need to accept blindly.
And as far as I see, life, the universe, god or whatever is always speaking to us.
Now it speaks as clear as day to me. There is no need to question it, I’ve had enough wild coincidences and experienced enough wonder that doubt is just some dust in a corner to clean up.
Don’t focus on what’s happening outside. Look at how what’s outside makes you feel. Look at how that differs from how the ideal version of yourself would feel. Look at the pain that causes such thoughts and emotions. Look at what you can let go of. Look at what deserves your appreciation, at what you can actually do.
Once you hold acceptance in one hand, you can use it to ground yourself and explore your will, your desire, your vision with the other. What could you do in this moment to feel better, even just 2% better? What could you do to make a loved one smile, to get just one step closer to your dream?
This is not a zero sum game. Those situations may exist in a forum created by your fellow men and women, but the infinite does not know any lack that you don’t assign to it. All things are possible, it’s just a matter of proximity between your current experience and the one you dream of.
How close are you to that reality you desire? What will it take to get there? Some paths are more treacherous and challenging than others. Some will require you to become something completely different from what you are right now, but they will beckon you forth if you follow their calling.
Your soul knows the path for you though, whether it’s one that will ring out in history or a quietly essential brick in the foundation of generations to come.
So pay attention to what life says to you because it is a reflection of what’s inside. It will show you your own distortions when you quiet your mind. It will show you your potential, both giving and cruel and allow you to choose. Sometimes it will even give you a map or a signal.
I don’t know exactly how I will get where I am going right now. My dreams still feel very far away, but when I look at how things could turn around in a second and often do, suddenly they are just a hair’s breadth away.
I could easily be living a completely different life in 6 months. It wouldn’t require much. A sudden increase of energy due to some tiny lifestyle habits, an opportunity presented by a single encounter, a death, a new friend, a change in policy, a new inspiration acted on.
Some may see this potential as an ill omen. If things could turn around for the better, they could turn around for the worse too couldn’t they?
But the universe knows no redundancy. It does not tell you in 10 words what it can tell you in one…if you are listening…
It only repeats itself when you miss what it’s trying to tell you.
If you can slow down enough and quiet your mind you will hear what it’s saying. You likely won’t see the full picture, but you’ll get a sense of what is calling you, where to plant the seeds of your attention.
I’m behind schedule on so much. Many of the things I want to do right now would be way too much for me in my current circumstance. But the universe has made it very clear which direction the possibilities are.
New relationships have begun to flower. Old ones have come back to life. I’ve realized that art and music and writing calls me much louder and more clearly than anything that would provide temporary stability. It may even prove more stable in the long run.
My bank balance and “what-if’s” are a distraction.
I realize many of my own weaknesses would have been easy to fix if I has just practiced a tiny bit of discipline and I can start at any moment so why not right now?
I see how my tendancy to focus on the bigger picture blinded me to all the things I could do in the moment to build up the skills necessary to eventually paint that picture of life I long to paint. And as long as I’m standing, its not to late.
I don’t need perfect focus, just enough to devote a tiny bit of energy every day to building the life I want to build. Some days life will give me favorable conditions and some days won’t but there will always be at least 10 minutes a day to devote to some kind of training that will greatly help me reach the destination I’ve set.
Usually there are hours hiding in the cracks, and all I need to do is to devote 10 minutes. If I can start, I’ll usually find the will to keep going or to restart the second I get a chance.
I am focusing that time on guitar right now, becoming someone who can jam on stage and work with any musician I like. It may feel late but that’s just a matter of perspective.
I want to organize festivals, but first I’ve got to start with something small and make that everything I can make it. I hope to get back to playing music live by next month.
There are many other goals and desires but those are periphery right now. There is no need to worry. I know the direction to move in because I hear the calling, even if only in brief moments.
So much can happen in a year. So much can happen in a moment.
Let the universe know your will, show it what you want with your actions and see what it says. Try everything you can and if it’s something you want enough it will usually give you an opening, and at the very least, it will provide you with an alternate path that fulfills you.
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“Art vs. Artist” by I+Everything MV
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