I have come to realize that as humans we tend to shift our gaze at some point in our lives. What I mean is in a different aspect. It can be about the way we see ourselves with someone, it can be the way we think about people, and it can also be the way we purport something. It is normal for change to happen, and also change is a constant thing. But it is very sad when you think of something or someone in a way and then you realize that this person you were thinking about is someone you like or it is someone you hold in high prestige, but what we want to do is to try not to make them know we value them.
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Tell me something I believe most of us do not know, including myself, and the thing is that when you like someone in such a way that you just want to see the surrounding person, you want to do things with a person, and you want to share ideas and gain more knowledge from the person, this thing will usually show itself even when you do not believe it is happening because they say something that behavior is like a flame, and there is no way you can hide or cover a flame; it will surely find its way out.
But why do we go with the idea that when you like someone, we find it hard to show it to the person? Some people will say that when the person knows that you like them, they misbehave because they believe that if you like them, you wouldn't want to leave them alone to suffer. But that is not the case, though. How can I believe that when you like someone and the person does something that is not good, that is when it is easy for you to correct them without feeling guilt?
Imagine you are correcting someone you do not know or someone you do not like; the way you correct them might differ because you will be trying to be careful and to also choose your words wisely. There is this friend I have that is a lady that thinks because we are both friends, she can disrespect me. Whenever she does something and I correct her, she will say she knows I will manage her because I like her. But one thing I always make her understand is that if she does what is not right or disrespects me, we will have issues.
She never thought it was a serious thing until the day she did that, which got me annoyed, and it was more like a disrespect. Immediately, I called her to order, and I said what she did was not okay with me, but she felt reluctant and annoyed and acted shabbily. We didn't speak for about a week, and she had to call back after a week of knowing that if she didn't reach out, it might likely continue that way. At first, it was hard because we were used to each other, but as time went by, she realized I was not coming back. Indirectly I have set a boundary that she will not want to cross another time. But, because she is a lady, I know she might not do it in that way again and might want to try something different. But she will know she will bear the consequence if anything happens. That is just the normal way to act and still keep those you value around you.
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